I Did A Thing: A Potentially Temporary Change

Just trying something out for size here, I went ahead and changed my profile name (for this blog only)!

Why? I posted awhile ago about the potential of changing my name to Sabrina due to a variety of reasons, and after getting some rather positive feedback from friends and readers alike I've finally decided wanted to try it out for size--see how it felt in regards to implementing this change as my pen name and/or legal name on a large scale. I'm serious in making this change eventually, assuming I like the way it sticks. And right now, I LOVE it! I love the way it looks (especially next to my updated photo).

How? I wrote in my article The Intimidating Truth - What It Means To Be Both an Editor and a Writer about how "Blogger and most other blogging sites, you can attach multiple blogs to one email, the profile of which will be shared across each blog". But I don't want to change my business-associated name yet, not until I'm certain of implementing this new change. But I fortunately had a quick fix for this. See, awhile back I had to create a separate business email for my oaktree editing services after my email (the one attached to this blog, a.k.a. my blogging email) got spammed with junk mail. Wanting a clean new start, I created an email account ONLY for business dealings. Up until now, aside from listing it as my contact email, I haven't attached that email to my Oaktree Editing site considering I didn't want to muddy the waters as it is a pain for me to jump from site to site when there are different email address associated to different blogs (via Blogger). Any of you who have a Blogger account know what I'm talking about!

The problem: For anyone finding themselves in the same or similar boat, I should tell you this change does not come without it's problems. I do have to sign out of one account to sign into the other. However, while this may prove to be slightly inconvenient for me currently, I'm still happy with this change and I don't think I'll be reverting back anytime soon.

New Chapters Are The WORST!

Granted this isn't always true, but I often have the hardest time between ending one chapter and starting the next. Eventually I find my flow and soon I'm back in the creative zone, but getting started on that next step in a book is generally where I find myself feeling stuck. As I am experiencing now. I just finished writing one chapter in my Edgewater novel (the title of which is still a placeholder until I make my final decision) and now I'm not sure how to continue. The novel jumps around in time, and I just finished going back over a decade prior to the story's "main time" (the time in which the majority of the story takes place) and now I wonder if I should stay in the past and keep the story moving forward from there, or if I should move back to the present (a.k.a. "main time") and recenter the reader from there. However, if I do that I fear there is a lot more to be answered for than that which has already been explained, though maybe that's for the best considering the novel is about the main character "Brie" finding herself through the uncoordinated series of events amidst a web of secrets and mysteries.

Well it is certainly a dilemma, one I will have to sit with for now considering I am seriously hungry and want to get a quick bite. Maybe drink a little wine. Watch a show. Get my head out of this. I'm just glad for now that I have the brain capacity to write at all, considering my meds have still had me in a horrible tail spin after all this time, which gets worse with every dose (which will be tonight). But maybe I'll be able to get my head off my writing dilemma, freeing me up for my creative streak later.

💗

Happy May! - A Personal Update

It's been awhile since I've written; almost all of April I had been suffering some rather serious side effects from a new medication a new doctor was having me try -- I've been accidentally off it for a week now and I have never felt better! Granted I have to go back on it today, and I'm not looking forward to it, but they're going to try to get me off as soon as possible. Anyhow, I wanted to write finally because I haven't been quite feeling up to it until now. So on that note, happy May! Though I am a day late to say as much. But I wanted to say it anyways.

In light of these struggles, I have done a lot of personal/self-exploration in regards to who I want to be, who I am, etc.; it's been much easier to focus on that than my suffering, I'll be honest. And something that has made me incredibly happy and has put me at ease, is the idea of changing my first name. I know I've talked about implementing the name "Kay" for myself (a derivative of my middle name), but while I've worked on implementing that into my daily life, it still hasn't felt quite right. During this time I have been consistently working on my new novel Edgewater (a temporary place holder of a title). The name character is nicknamed Brie, which readers immediately learn was a name given to her by her brother and is actually short for Emberly (how she got this nickname from her brother is a story in of itself). I've been trying to figure out her birth name, an exploration that has coincided with my own. I decided to do some searching into the meaning behind a few of my favorite names, and discovered one which is incredibly perfect. After a free "journal write" (me just typing away at my laptop) I think I will actually choose this for myself. Now I know that might sound odd, suddenly just changing my name (again) but I am going to share with you this journal write which has helped me come to such a meaningful and final conclusion:

[click to enlarge]

Speaking of writing, I am currently still searching for an editor for my Shattered Lives novel. I am also still writing my new book which I have taken to simply calling Edgewater as a nickname - though it's only a temporary place holder until I can figure out an actual title, mostly as I am still trying to figure out what it's "main goal" is (what it's truly about). Maybe you as a reader of this blog can help?

Edgewater is a sci-fy novel which focuses on a young woman, Brie, who has lost over a decade's worth of memories. In search for these missing pieces, she must uncover a web of secrets exposing the organization known as "Edgewater" (hence the title place holder), and its founders. Through non-consecutive story telling (the novel jumps around in time, each chapter is titled with the date, time and location to indicate which time period we're in), the readers learn these secrets along side the characters in the book. 

Funny, after writing the above synopsis (in bold), I feel like maybe I've been over thinking the title. Perhaps Edgewater is the perfect name for this novel! And maybe, just as Robert Singer (Supernatural TV show writer) named a character after himself, I can do the same with my own character? After all, she is the apple and I am the tree--I have been writing her in a fictionalized sense of my own self. Maybe then it is only natural that I name her "Sabrina" too....