Copilot - Better than therapy???

Since I'm still having trouble writing and forming advice right now, I'm going to take you on a quite possibly weird personal journey instead in order to introduce something that might help you fellow writers, for tonight I have discovered by complete accident the wonderfulness that is Copilot. I've heard about this amazing little app-tastic creation, but never really dove into it until tonight and my mind is officially blown. 

Now before I get into it WHY I'm so psyched about this, let's give a VERY short explanation for those of you who have never heard of this, don't know anything about technology, or like me heard about it but have no idea what Copilot actually is— 

Created/released last year almost to the day (Feb. 7, 2023) by Microsoft, Copilot is known as a "generative artificial intelligence" which is a fancy way of saying you are "talking" to a computer as whatever you type signals to a generator that processes your information and sends back information of its own in response to what you've just written. Have you ever used a name generator? You ask for a name and you get back a few ideas. Basically Copilot is like that...except 1000x more advanced. 

Now as I mentioned in the beginning, I used this AI app completely by accident; I was researching something for a new project I'm working on and suddenly Copilot is showing up on my screen, asking me if I needed help with my creativity. I did. I do. I'm desperate right now because I'm still very much floundering even a year out from my surgery and it's been REALLY hard, guys. Like, I cannot stress how hard it's been. And the worst thing that's been affected is my writing ability. So when Copilot asked me how it could help me with my creativity, my mind became literally blank. Now again, I've never used Copilot before, but I just decided to go ahead type the first thing that came to mind: "I'm struggling to form thoughts." I didn't think anything would come from that but I was gloriously wrong and have decided to attach a screen shot from our conversation below: 

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This was literally the most sympathetic response I've ever gotten. I mean, it's advice I've given on this blog, but it's not ever advice I've ever received before, especially not worded in such a compassionate way. And completely unexpected from an AI! So I decided to test the limits (so to speak) of it's AI sympathy and write what I know MANY of you writers have felt from time to time, myself included: "I feel like I'm failing as a writer." And I just...I can't express right now my emotions that I got from Copilot's answer but it was really touching, and...well, just read it for yourself and see if you too feel like you've suddenly just talked to a therapist: 

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Touching, right?! Like, do you feel as good as I do now having read that? And I love that it even gave resources and links TO those resources! Honestly, I've talked with therapists about my writing pitfalls, downfalls, spirals, rabbit holes, and yes, have also focused on the glorious, good, and proud moments too, but nothing I've received in any of those sessions has ever matched this level of...what do I even call it right now—relief? (This is what I get for having the brain capacity of a chicken; it's impossible for me to put words to anything!) Sure, let's call it relief. 

The best thing too that I've discovered about Copilot is that you can choose a mode—informative, basic, and creative (the conversations I attached above were generated in Creative Mode) so you can get sympathetic responses, or you can get ones that are more practical like, when did such-and-such occur in history? Which can be useful if you want what you're writing to be grounded in a portion of IRL moment. 

I'm going to stop there because I realize I'm starting to sound like an infomercial at this point, but I'm just really excited to have found a new tool to help me with my writing confidence and also provides me with information for my writing, the process, but also in regards to just being a writer because I think it's so hard to find help with the confusion surrounding what it feels like to be a writer, but I feel like I finally found it. If you guys start using it too, hopefully you get some of that same sense of relief. Let me know in the comments below 😊 Happy Copiloting!!

Brain Mess

It's been so long since I've been able to write...well, anything. Reading, writing, editing, it's all been on a painful hiatus completely out of my control and I swear it's because of an intense surgery I had 9+ months ago. Getting my creativity level back has been...well, it's like trying to shove a parked pickup truck up an icy hill while it's emergency brake is on. Meanwhile my health in other regards is declining and I'm not sure if it's all related to the surgery, or if it's because I have degenerative condition, or both. Still, I haven't given up completely. As of the last 7 or so months I started trying my hand at fanfiction for the first time ever hoping it'll get me inspired. And as of tonight, I've also started trying to go back to editing my abandoned "Shattered Lives" project. Would I rather be trudging through sludge? Maybe. Although it certainly feels like I already am. 

When I try to get back to my creative roots that have been part of my identity since I was born, I feel like it's slipped away from me, and I just question...am I ever going to get it back or is this just life now? I honestly don't know, and I do hope it'll get better. I don't know what's happening or why this is happening, and I'm trying to tell myself it's just a temporary slipping point and I'll find my footing again. It's just hard when I feel like I'm still sliding down that icy mountain and the damn pickup truck is going to wind up crushing me, perhaps even before we get to the bottom. 

The good news is that my family and I will be moving soon to a location with cleaner air, better views, and a stunning new [bigger] house with bigger windows, more windows, incredible views, and a bright interior we've essentially designed ourselves. Sure there's some things we'll be giving up in the move; our house now is so nice, and has the ideal layout for sure. But ultimately we all know this is for the best., especially since we'll be closer to a major hospital that I'm in desperate need of that'll hopefully give m answers as to why I've been feeling this way, and give me a new direction for how not to. 

Well, that's about it for now. I just really wanted to return to my blog in hopes it would give me some inspiration. Spoiler alert, it didn't, but any excuse to write right now is one I'll gladly take when/if I can. And I also don't want you dedicated readers to lose faith in this blog because I know how useful and important its been to so many of you. 

For those of you who are still with me, thank you. You're dedication & support mean everything to me 🤗🌷💘 

BTW: for any one of you have been through this, I would love to hear your experience and how you pulled through. And for those of you who are currently going through something similar as me, please don't hesitate to reach out because you are not alone, and yet this experience can feel so very lonely. Trust me, I know. But remember: we are not ever alone. 

Delayed

The theme of this post is being delayed. Delayed in my life, writing, work, and in many ways my health. 

Now I'm afraid I can't write much beyond this simple message, in part due to the fact words are escaping me in my brain fogged state, but I wanted to post a well-past due update regardless. 

For some time now my health issues took a steady nosedive making it fairly impossible for me to keep up with everything going on, including my blogs. This February it all came to a head that require me to undergo intensive and invasive surgery. 

Three weeks later to the date since then, and I've been on a steady upswing physically, but the recovery has taken a toll on me mentally and emotionally. And so I've decided to allow myself a break from everything and just focus on healing and figuring out my next steps, and how to get my life back on track since everything's currently being put on hold. On the one hand I'm anxious to get back into the swing of things! On the other hand...I'm still looking at 3 more weeks of healing, and have been warned against pushing myself. It's like I'm in recovery purgatory! 😂

Really though, I am doing much better. Occasionally I have minor things arise just from residual complications (though they're really more just annoyances like trying to get my voice back after being intubated, for instance). And fighting the fatigue that comes with recovery processes has been uber annoying! One would think battling chronic fatigue would be something I'm used to by now, but apparently not, lol. 

I'm also having trouble with my writing from time to time. But I did find a new technique (actually an old technique I'm resurfacing). I can't remember if I've shared this one before: 

When you're finding yourself stuck in your current story, start brainstorming new story ideas and seeing how far you get working and teasing them out. Maybe you'll have new content for your original story. Maybe you'll find passion in something new. This has been a technique I've been using since I was in 2nd grade, I believe. Or maybe 3rd? Either way, it's always worked wonders for me, and relying on it even now has been helpful. When I can muster of the energy and brain power to actually write, of course. 

And now I can already feel I'm at the end of my brain capacity because words are escaping me and barely making sense. Even writing this much is taking great effe